OK, here’s where the Presidential Campaign of 2012 stands now. First off, last month, unelectable Pizza Magnate Herman Cain “suspended” his campaign, in a fog of sexual misconduct allegations. The final straw was when Ginger White accused him of having a 13-year affair. So ends that sideshow. Newt Gingrich jumped into Cain’s spot as flavor of the month, but he quickly became distasteful to voters.
By the time of the Iowa Caucus on January 3rd, 2012 Newt had lost his luster, coming in fourth. Unsurprisingly, Mitt Romney won with 30,015 votes, however the big surprise of the day was Rick Santorum with 30,007 votes, only 8 less than Romney! It turns out Rick, who had only a small amount of money compared to the other candidates, had replaced money with hard work. He visited all 99 counties in Iowa, speaking to potential voters and it paid off. It's impressive enough that I almost regret how I have depicted him on this blog. Almost. Of course, he can’t use that approach in every state; there just isn’t enough time for that.
In third place, Ron Paul with 26,219 votes, more than double what he got here in 2008. This was as good as a victory to his cultish fans and much better than anyone expected. Between the three of them, this equals 70 percent (if you could combine them into one Super-Candidate it could in theory beat Obama) but bear in mind that this is 70 percent of 5.4% of the total voters in Iowa. Yes, this was a “record turnout” and it only drew that small a percentage of the registered voters!
Michele Bachmann also set a record; she had the largest drop in popularity in Iowa history from winning the straw poll to losing the caucuses. She won the straw poll in August with 28.6 percent of the vote but on January 3rd, she only received 5 percent of the votes, which put her in 6th place! She has quit her campaign; here at The Strangest Adventures, we’ll miss her. Meanwhile 4th place Newt Gingrich, 5th place Rick Perry, and 6th place Jon Huntsman continue on. Next stop, New Hampshire!
If you are still reading at this point, perhaps you enjoy this type of humor enough to want a The Strangest Adventures T-Shirt. I’ve tried to include the main candidates in the 2012 Presidential election in this homage to the Justice League/Justice Society/All-Star Squadron team-up of the 1980’s, Crisis on Earth Prime. This is my first “official” foray into T-Shirt design, aside from home printed and applied iron-ons for myself and others, an early noble design experiment. I would appreciate any feedback, positive or negative, that anyone could provide. And note, I have provided inexpensively priced shirts for the tight of budget as well as premium style shirts. Wear this shirt to tell others you think the candidates are as much of a freak show as I see them to be, well at least in my fevered imagination! Your support would be appreciated; this would supplement my meager earnings from freelance work.
Ah Representative Michele Bachmann, the gift that keeps on giving. She is currently running 9% to 12% behind Romney is various polls, but that still puts her in second place. Not bad, and, unexpected. She IS the darling of the tea parties, and their champion in congress, so certainly that may account for her numbers. She always claims to be against government spending (apparently not the cases for her husband–more on that in a moment). Pretty ironic by the way that she’s an anti-tax advocate who once worked as an attorney collecting taxes for the IRS. Representative Bachmann claims to have the solution to all our woes. She wants to revoke the federal minimum wage. She believes that eliminating this and other regulations would “virtually wipe out unemployment.” Could this work? I don’t know, I doubt the answer is that easy. Though I wonder how Ms. Bachmann would fare on minimum wage. And then there’s the curious case of her husband Dr. Marcus Bachmann. He has collected Medicaid monies for his clinic, Bachmann & Associates. One thing is clear enough, Marcus Bachmann collected state aid, and he got these state funds and used them for, among other things, counseling gays to change their sexual orientation. He said last year on Point of View Radio Talk Show that "barbarians need to be educated" when asked how parents should deal with their homosexual children. “They need to be disciplined, just because someone feels it or thinks it doesn’t mean that we are supposed to go down that road.” What he’s referring to is “reparative therapy”, the crackpot idea that gays can be cured through therapy. I believe people are who they are, and can’t be “fixed” nor should they be. Most mental professionals agree with me, attempts to change orientation can be dangerous and lead to suicide. So far Bachmann has remained silent about this, perhaps hoping the furor will die down. We’ll see. Maybe we can return to merely pointing out Michele’s foibles such as when she confused John Wayne with John Wayne Gacy! When asked why she launched her candidacy from Waterloo, Iowa, she said, "Well what I want them to know is just like John Wayne was from Waterloo, Iowa. That's the kind of spirit that I have, too." Yikes!
