Our Story So Far

OK, here’s where the Presidential Campaign of 2012 stands now. First off, last month, unelectable Pizza Magnate Herman Cain “suspended” his campaign, in a fog of sexual misconduct allegations. The final straw was when Ginger White accused him of having a 13-year affair. So ends that sideshow. Newt Gingrich jumped into Cain’s spot as flavor of the month, but he quickly became distasteful to voters.  

By the time of the Iowa Caucus on January 3^rd, 2012 Newt had lost his luster, coming in fourth. Unsurprisingly, Mitt Romney won with 30,015 votes, however the big surprise of the day was

Rick Santorum with 30,007 votes, only 8 less than Romney! It turns out Rick, who had only a small amount of money compared to the other candidates, had replaced money with hard work. He visited all 99 counties in Iowa, speaking to potential voters and it paid off. It's impressive enough that I almost regret how I have depicted him on this blog. Almost. Of course, he can’t use that approach in every state; there just isn’t enough time for that.

In third place, Ron Paul with 26,219 votes, more than double what he got here in 2008. This was as good as a victory to his cultish fans and much better than anyone expected. Between the three of them, this equals 70 percent (if you could combine them into one Super-Candidate it could in theory beat Obama) but bear in mind that this is 70 percent of 5.4% of the total voters in Iowa. Yes, this was a “record turnout” and it only drew that small a percentage of the registered voters!

Michele Bachmann also set a record; she had the largest drop in popularity in Iowa history from winning the straw poll to losing the caucuses. She won the straw poll in August with 28.6 percent of the vote but on January 3^rd, she only received 5 percent of the votes, which put her in 6^th place! She has quit her campaign; here at The Strangest Adventures, we’ll miss her. Meanwhile 4^th place Newt Gingrich, 5^th place Rick Perry, and 6^th place Jon Huntsman continue on. Next stop, New Hampshire!

By Special Request-Planet Wingnuttia

Longtime readers of this blog know Ed Brayton and his Dispatches from the Culture Wars. I don’t think I would have started this blog without his encouragement. Recently he requested that I create a new feature, Planet Wingnuttia, to highlight hypocrisy on the political scene, that we could share on both blogs.  So, for the first issue, we’ve gone with the concept of conservatives that tout traditional marriage while trading in wives as often as some people replace cell phones. It is also pretty unbelievable to me that Newt Gingrich is, at this late date, “running for president”. This “curio from another time” resigned in disgrace from congress and hasn’t held office since the 1990’s; in my opinion he’s only there to promote himself and his books. The most amazing story here, perhaps, is that four different women were actually willing to marry Rush Limbaugh!

The Strangest Adventures T-Shirts!

If you are still reading at this point, perhaps you enjoy this type of humor enough to want a The Strangest Adventures T-Shirt. I’ve tried to include the main candidates in the 2012 Presidential election in this homage to the Justice League/Justice Society/All-Star Squadron team-up of the 1980’s, Crisis on Earth Prime. This is my first “official” foray into T-Shirt design, aside from home printed and applied iron-ons for myself and others, an early noble design experiment. I would appreciate any feedback, positive or negative, that anyone could provide. And note, I have provided inexpensively priced shirts for the tight of budget as well as premium style shirts. Wear this shirt to tell others you think the candidates are as much of a freak show as I see them to be, well at least in my fevered imagination! Your support would be appreciated; this would supplement my meager earnings from freelance work.

http://www.cafepress.com/TheStrangestAdventures  

Candidates of 2012-Newt Gingrich

Many consider Newt the biggest brain in the GOP. Certainly, there is no surfeit of Republican intellectualism since the death of William F. Buckley, but Newt? He is a prolific author, having written 26 books to date but some believe he is only in the race to keep the Gingrich brand in the public eye, just an attempt to increase his book sales. He is a frequent reviewer at amazon.com as well, his specialty being military history. Politically, he has painted Democrats, particularly President Obama, as “left-wing radicals” who lead a “secular socialist machine”. He wrote that “The secular-socialist machine represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did.” Yikes!

Former Speaker of the House, his last act as an elected official was to resign over the shame of his party losing 6 seats in the 1998 election, the worst performance in 64 years for a party that didn't hold the presidency. Ah, simpler times. Newt has had a somewhat variable personal life; he has switched from Baptist to Catholic and from wife to wife. Currently there’s the issue of his high dollar account at Tiffany’s; this is hardly consistent with the frugal image Gingrich is trying to project.

A few weeks ago his campaign staff resigned en masse, following Newt’s inexplicably timed luxury Mediterranean Cruise. I took this opportunity to depict one possible view of Newt’s reaction. OK, so it’s an unlikely scenario, I’ve never let that stop me before. There were questions about the future of his presidential campaign less than a month after it was launched. I strongly suspect Gingrich won’t be the candidate for the GOP for 2012 or ever.